This weekend I'm heading to the local Sheraton for a well-deserved vacation. It's not much, but it's going to be fun. I'm burnt out and exhausted, and dammit, I deserve this.
So the question is...
Why is it just one weekend? If I'm this great and powerful magician, why the fuck aren't I living that lifestyle all the freakin' time?
Answer:
I haven't done the Work. TANSTAAFL. Fr. S.L. recently began a conversation with me about material manifestations and the cube of space. Most of it is over my head, because he's smarter than I am. I had to beg off in the middle because I'd spent 10 hours in front of a computer monitor at work already, and my eyes were burning. I didn't have the bandwidth to keep up. My brain was fried by all this other crap I deal with all day long. And it doesn't look like it's going to end any time soon.
So. What am I going to do about it? The Lottery thing hasn't worked. I need better communications. I tried a pendulum, but I couldn't get into the swing of things. (BH, that one's for you.) I felt like I was just hanging there, going in circles. My son came in during the ceremony (BAM! Hi Dad! Oh, are you talking to Angels? Sorry! BAM!). The numbers I thought I had confirmation on from the pendulum didn't come up. :sigh:
So, it's back to the drawing board. A friend made a suggestion on the lottery-genius-conjuring thing, and I'll try that, even though it doesn't make any sense logically. At least not any different sense logically. I won't have my stuff to get the genius name with me tonight, so I'm just going to buy a regular old ticket and see how that works, no magic to speak of.
I've got another technique I'm going to work on as well, but it takes a couple of weeks of preparatory consecrations and prayer, and then the manifestation begins to occur.
And I'm going to start online classes in magic. Something interactive, audio-visual, maybe a decent studio setup and web sharing and stuff like that. Start with the Modern Angelic Grimoire, and throw in some other stuff. I'll be finishing my book in the next couple of months, an introduction to spirit work for the beginner-to-moderately-advanced practitioner, and I'll send that off to the publishers. I've also got some other things in my sleeves that I might turn into a profitable venture come this Spring and Summer. the goal is to not have to work anymore after Summer. At least, not more than three days a week.
I'll keep you posted here.
Head for the Red: The ongoing adventures and insights of a magician's attempts to accomplish the Great Work.
Firstly, Have a nice weekend. I Hope you enjoy yourselves.
ReplyDeleteSecondly, In regards to the lottery: I was thinking about the genius of a time and place, ie. is it possible to calculate the genius of a specific second/moment? If it were I would calculate the genius and evil daimon names for each approximate timing of each ball being drawn, then bind the demon, and ask the genius for the number, Although that scenario is probably impossible, and also time consuming. Other than that, my thinking would lead me to simultaneously invoking the planet of wealths senior, and the genius of the moment (of the lottery draw), and using a method to divine the numbers that way. The only explanation I can think for why the magickal people aren't winning involves the theory of infinate potentiality, where every thing that can happen does, creating infinate realities. So in theory for every attempt you've made to predicts the numbers, there are a bunch of Rufus' in other dimensions living it up Lottery style. Although I don't know how that melds with your belief structure. Not even sure I believe it myself, in fact I think I've started to ramble.
One last point:
TANSTAAFL? sure there is, its called breat feeding, it does go down hill abit after that though. You should also check out Freeganism;
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Freeganism
But I'm really just being contrary at this point.
I still think you aren't redirecting the tsunami effect enough. Maybe you know how starting the online class can be connected to winning the lottery, but it comes off as more of the same old thing, especially a connectivity with increasing your day job duties.
ReplyDeleteHoliday is a good choice to clear cobwebs, but I'd call up the enochians and ask them for help in focusig your life and uncluttering things in a positive way, like you not getting fired, but still getting more freed up time.
The situation feels from my perspective that in wanting to win the lottery, so you don't have to work, you are increasing the amount of work you don't want to do and convincing yourself that this added, unwanted work is somehow connected to winning the lottery and freeing you from having to work.
Starting an online magick class can help you get back to the basics and involving others, so you retain a level of 'professionalism' and responsibility that you don't go over the basics in a bad way, it doesn't seem like it'd have that strong of an effect on yourself that you're hoping for. Not unless it is geared more towards things that would help in developing your deficiencies. But, the effort you spend teaching others in the class is energy you could have been using to advance yourself.
Even if it was connected to you via some teaching template, you've already been over the basics and some of the advanced stuff already.
Instead of looking for something completely new, the answer might be within a deeper and forceful knowing of what's already there.
My best advice would be to not work on this lottery genius conjuring thing. The only new things you should work on are those that support the deficiencies that you have. From what I know of what you've written online, you have a lot of already established 'mystical roads/pathways', some not as developed as other. And I bet you a hundred bucks that if I knew the full extent of your entire mystical study, I could find others, including ones you aren't consicous of.
You're starting to come off as an electic, fluttering from one attempt to the next, while you let other areas of your life have a strong presence on your magickal efforts when they do nothing but stifle your attempts.