Wednesday, October 05, 2011

Some Serious Magic

The Detroit Lions have sucked donkey shit for years in terms of being a professional football team.

Here's their record:

Year  Wins-Losses
1998     5-11
1999     8-8
2000     9-7
2001     2-14
2002     3-13
2003     5-11
2004     6-10
2005     5-11
2006     3-13
2007     7-9
2008     0-16
2009     2-14
2010     6-10

You'll note that the last time they even won more games in a season than they lost was in 2000.

Then some British kabalist, with as much interest in American football as any proper British man should have, picks the goddamned Detroit Lions to run a series of experiments on. "A Lion has Roared" he calls it.

In the last four games, the Lions have won, and won hard. They're facing the Bears next week, and they're favored to win. It's still early in the season, but right now the Lions are tied with the Packers for the lead in their division. In my opinion, that's pretty unbefuckinglievable.

I'm watching this experiment with a great deal of interest. I'm looking forward to seeing the results at the end of the season.

Sports though? Really? What has the wins/losses of the Detroit Lions have to do with magicians? Fuck, if you don't know the answer to that one, shame on you. Simon Tomasi's blog is "Trainee Golem Builder." He's in training. He's experimenting, practicing. He's taken on a project that can have pretty obvious results. He's testing his skills, flexing his magical muscles. He's learning how to influence the world.

He picked something he doesn't really give a shit about (I don't think), American Football. It might not seem like a big deal, but Detroit's going through some major shit. They don't have a lot to be proud of right now. They don't have a lot, period. They're broke and desperate, the Somalia of the United States. A successful home team can be a morale booster that slops over into all aspects of the city's economy, crime, and future expansion. Every win brings a little bit of joy to Michiganders who have been consistently disappointed for a decade in their team's performance, in their treatment by the unions and the auto manufacturing companies, and their government. The indirect consequences of a winning season in Detroit could be huge.

Well begun, sir. And good luck.