Monday, January 27, 2014

Any time you want to...

As she mentions in her latest blog post (Shabbatai!), Harper and I performed a Saturn rite this weekend. It went really well, and she outlines the steps we went through for the conjuration, so I'll try not to repeat too much.

My experiences were very much in keeping with hers. I saw an old man's face in the crystal when we conjured Tzaphqiel, and he just sat there staring at us. There wasn't a lot of interaction, the way there usually is. Harper is often filled with the Spirits we summon, and the conjurations can get really intense. Having a standy-offey spirit was sort of weird in comparison to our usual experiences.

I should note that we conjured Tzaphqiel instead of Cassiel. I've been working with the names of the aRchangels from the Art of Drawing Spirits into Crystals for a few months, because I liked them. I wanted to switch to Tzaphqiel because I've been ... ahem, I've been studying KBL and doing Golden Dawn derived rites lately. It's been pretty cool, all things considered, but that's another post.

Anyway, we went for Tzaphqiel instead of Cassiel this time, and I thought it would be pretty much the same experience, the way Tzadqiel and Sachiel tend to be pretty much the same. It was not. Cassiel fills the room all heavy and dense. He is FATE on site when he comes. He is full and present and expectant, and he fills me with an awareness of his presence. Tzaphqiel was less intense, and a hella lot more observant. Expectant. Tight-lipped and sealed. I felt like I had to do the talking. Which was actually ok, but I didn't understand what was up until later.

Harper did some research afterwards and found several parallels between our experiences with Tzaphqiel and those of other folks. The common theme in descriptions of this Archangel in modern literature revolves around the word "watcher," with the emphasis being on the things Tzaphqiel observes coming down from the unmanifest to the manifest, and vice-versa. So seeing a face of a hoary old man looking at me intently makes perfect sense. I felt observed.

So I went into the statement of intent:

"Open us now to hear (+), and to receive (+) and to express (+) the accumulated wisdom of your sphere as we need it in these temporary lives. Make us fit vessels to bear the Wisdom of Jehovah Elohim, make us wise in your ways, yea make us wise in your ways."

The (+) indicates making the sign of the cross, specifically over the wine that became a eucharistic sacrament we later consumed.

Then I saw a young face superimposed over a dead face, a lot like the Anatomy Occultus face I referenced the other day.* I saw that face obscured by scintilating glimmering web-like occlusions in the crystal, and then I saw those fade away, revealing the face again. I understood without hearing a word that what I was seeing was the means to attain that which I desired.

Saturn is the first sphere through which an Idea passes on its way to manifestation in the Hermetic cosmology. It's also the last sphere things pass through as they return to the unmanifest as they fade from this world into the experience of the Source of all. In this sphere can be found the wisdom of all that has ever been intended, and the experience of all that has ever happened, all that ever was, all that is, and all that is to come. ALL of it. All the time. In all the times.

So that's what I wanted to be able to tap at will. And that's what I saw. To get there, remember that we are the was/is, the youth-in-death and death-in-youth, be in touch with that mortal-immortal selfness, remember clearly that we are immortal gods made flesh for the sake of love and the experience of our lives, recall and reclaim our essential nature, and that wisdom is ours for the taking. Just get past the glimmery glinty shit that gets in the way, tune out the bright shiney, and focus on the essential nature of ourselves-in-toto, us perfectly manifesting for the pleasure of it all.

And then we'll simply know.

After the rite, we went to bed, and I woke up fucking freezing. Like ice. My extremities were extremely cold. feet and hands, and I couldn't warm up, even though it was in the 60s outside, and warmer inside. Took a hot shower to get the chill driven out completely.

That passed, but I've been feeling the forces integrating into my sphere eer since. I dreamed of being eternal, like Doctor Who, and saw specifically how the things I spent my time on changed immediately from mundane to epic. Because when you live forever, you have time to do whatever the fuck you want. I found myself restructuring my personal time, scheduling workouts, daily practie, meditation, LRPs, LRHs, fucking journaling, and my new day-job work, and the things I can do to get to the stuff that makes me happy. Effiiency, effective spending of the currency of our times upon the Earth.

And tapping into all that, it's really a simple thing, it's turning the attention inward and upward, seeing past the illusion of both, and being what we are. Lifting the "veil" of all the things we get wrapped up with on a daily basis, and seeing that simple truth of who we really are underneath, and why we're here.

And yeah, it's something we can do, any time we want to.

Just remember who you are.

Any time you want to.

* The sales of that image have raised over $700 for Dove and Serpent Oasis in less than a week. You guys ROCK!

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